By gay ping pong I don’t mean some lewd game at a gay bar. I mean Bayit Yehudi and Yesh Atid standing on two sides of a ping pong table and batting around the gay political ping pong ball. I’m trying to imagine if I would be offended assuming I were gay and have the same principles I have now. As it is now, I’m annoyed.

Bayit Yehudi is running some inane ad about how all their members did this and that to help prevent gay marriage and how important that is because if homosexuals were allowed to “marry”, then the whole world will erupt in an orgy of homosexuality by sheer compulsion.

I hear from a Bayit Yehudi party member that the guy in the 16th seat on the list, Ronen Shoval I think, actually said that if gay marriage were legalized, by which I mean gay couples got the privilege of being more heavily taxed like straight couples (thank God for taxes) then “more people would want it”.

I looked at the guy (a male) who told me this, and said to him, “I’m sorry, but regardless of whether gays can marry, I still wouldn’t find you in the least bit sexy.”

To the meat of it: I like Youtube cooking channels. So I’m watching a recipe, and I usually skip the ad. But this time it’s a big hairy guy, a massive hulking gorilla-looking man, dressed like a woman with a wig and makeup. I’m suspended in morbid fascination so I don’t press the skip button. S/He’s saying something about how s/he decided to become a woman because this is how s/he feels on the inside.

I’m fine with that, I really don’t care how people want to dress themselves or why. All the power to ya, whoever you are, really, do what you gotta do. But for some reason I’m supposed to vote for Pretty Boy Lapid because of this gorilla transvestite girl unfortunate enough to be born into a decisively manly testosterone-infested body?

So we have Bayit Yehudi telling me how great it is that all their guys are totally against gay people doing whatever it is they do, and then I have Pretty Boy Lapid telling me how great it is that he’s so totally supportive of hulkingly masculine cross-dressers.

Really, this is what politics is. These are the people that have the ability to start nuclear wars in my name. The ones bitching to each other about how much or little they support the right of transvestites to cross dress or marry other genderly confused people. They’re playing a game of gay ping pong and I don’t want to be in the stands.

OK, I’ll admit one thing though. As stupid as the transvestite clip was (I really have no idea why I’m supposed to vote Yesh Lapid because of a transvestite) this ad was better.

Basically, two women who decide to get married and have a baby by artificial insemination have to go through a parenting class before the baby that just came out of one of the women’s bodies is legally considered the baby’s mother. She has the baby, then must take a government class before being considered the legal guardian, even though she just gave birth to it. Now that is certainly messed up and should be changed.

However, something tells me that Pretty Boy Lapid won’t be changing squat about anything. He’s just playing a game of gay ping pong, and it’s his volley.